Conan Exiles addresses tech issues post launch, laughs at dong obsession

Funcom’s brand-new early access survival sandbox Conan Exiles got a patch yesterday aiming to clean up multiple issues in the game, including server sorting and selection, Steam Connect tools, disconnects, and building damage. You should also never immediately die of hunger after respawning. Bonus.

On Twitter, the studio told fans that it’s still working on boosting server capacity “as soon as tomorrow, but it will take time.” It’s also working on rubberbanding problems and is promises patches on the daily.

Meaaaaannnnnwhile, the internet has discovered that egalitarian body sliders mean lots and lots of male anatomy. (Hey dudes, if you’re discombobulated by the sudden obsession with your sparkly bits, imagine how we’ve felt all this time!) Here’s one NSFW example — totes not safe for work, but amusing nonetheless — retweeted by a Funcom employee. You’re welcome!

MOP’s Andrew and MJ began streaming the game starting Monday; I understand shirts are also entirely optional. Here’s their Tuesday show!

Source: Steam
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57 Comments on "Conan Exiles addresses tech issues post launch, laughs at dong obsession"

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drypulse

wangtastic?

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kelvar

I’m going to make a barbarian with the biggest muscles, the tiniest dong and call him Compensator The Conqueror!

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Phubarrh

And this, folks, is why Brexit happened…

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GoJammit

Can someone tell me how to change my name?

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Utakata

Well…there’s a name I haven’t seen Massively-that-was! o.O
But answer your question…
Legally? I have a vague idea how that’s down in this country of Canada. Not so sure State side though…beyond I believe can be done.
Account wise? Roll any of the sign up options with an alias. Beyond that, I am not sure it’s possible to change your name you are using with signing up here currently. Sorry. :(

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Archebius

Discombobulated? I’m just disappointed this isn’t more common.

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Utakata

If there is an article that needs Mr. Schlag’s insightful input right now, it this one! Lol! :)

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Bryan Correll

Schlag…….or Schlong?

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Utakata

You know…admittedly that thought did cross my mind. But my pigtails like to be perceived of having more etiquette. :(

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rafael12104

Hmm.. so does the size of your “little Conan” give you enhanced abilities of some type? ;)

kofteburger
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kofteburger

I’ll just leave this here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPrnduGtgmc

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Bryan Correll
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rafael12104

Lol. Well, that was hilarious. Unfortunately now when I go to my Youtube page it is going to be a recommendation be cause I listened to it.

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enamel

I much prefer Rust’s randomly generated gender, race and organ sizing. Probably one of my most favorite things to happen in video games this decade.

kofteburger
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kofteburger

I hated that so much I deleted the game from my Steam account. And I had payed the full price.

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Brother Maynard

lots and lots of male anatomy

Ahh, I am relieved. At long last, I’ll be able to create a character with the big feet I’ve always wanted!