WRUP: Welcome to Boring Monsters Online edition

    
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You really know nothing about me and no one cares.

Thank you for signing up to play Boring Monsters Online, where we have diligently made sure that all of our monsters seem like they could come directly off of someone’s high school notebook. Our pledge to our players is that we will never present you with a new sort of monster that might be even slightly unfamiliar, just as we will assume you have lived in a hole and have no idea about what any sort of fantasy monsters look like. Does the idea of differently colored dragons with all sorts of elemental breath weapons make you faint with excitement? Then you’ll love this.

We’ve got minotaurs, griffons, chimera, even those weirder ones like beholders. And they’re all exactly like they’ve been in every other fantasy game ever, and we’re still going to act like no one has ever had the idea to put a minotaur in a video game before. Enjoy hearing us wax poetic about how special stock-standard cow-people are. Let us know how creative we are in the comments to this week’s What Are You Playing, while we’re at it.

Andrew Ross (@dengarsw): I’m still trying to get a good Zapdos in Pokemon Go, so I’ll be playing that with my group. Splatoon 2 might see some time too.

Brianna Royce (@nbrianna, blog): There is no compelling reason to be playing anything but Guild Wars 2 this weekend, so that’s where I’ll be. I’m not sure I’m going to go nuts with the preview content, though, because I don’t really want to be spoiled all that much more than I already have to be. But I’ll probably got have a look-see and then go back what I was already doing in the game. Whee!

Eliot Lefebvre (@Eliot_Lefebvre, blog): My usual primary haunt of Final Fantasy XIV remains; in addition, I’ll be starting my time in Shroud of the Avatar. The good news is that lots of people have strong suggestions about where I should start. The bad news is that none of those suggestions agree with one another.

Justin Olivetti (@Sypster, blog): I’m still doggedly working on finishing the first zone of Lord of the Rings Online: Mordor, enjoying the experience but feeling like I’m the pokey little puppy that I am. I also have a new LOTRO Hunter alt I’m exploring, and I’m pushing further into Secret World Legends’ Transylvania.

Your turn!

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