humor

WRUP: Enjoy the smooth flavor of Mrs. Patter’s Bacon-Fried Cookies edition

Guys, we could not be more excited to start getting in on the branded content game, and we’re starting with endorsing Mrs. Patter’s Bacon-Fried Cookies! But we promise you, this won’t really affect our content, which is refreshing and fried in the grease of simmering hog fat just like Mrs. Patter’s delicious cookies! Available in all sorts of wonderful flavors, like Strawberries & Bacon, Vanilla Custard & Bacon, Peanut Butter & Cheese, and of course, Blueberry & Broken Glass & Bacon That Doesn’t Taste Right!

We’ll still be bringing you all of the same great MMO content you’ve come to expect, it’ll just cover a wider spectrum. Like which flavor of Mrs. Patter’s cookies to enjoy with your favorite game, or why Mrs. Patter’s Meth & Bile cookies help you stay focused during intense play sessions, or which games have GMs most willing to call an ambulance because you are eating a kind of cookie the FDA has prohibited from sale in the United States. Let us know what you’re playing down in the comments of What Are You Playing, and the best response gets a free box of Mrs. Patter’s Bacon-Fried Cookies (Now With Less Asbestos, Probably)!

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World of Warcraft: Battle for Azeroth sets a world record for its diorama

Turns out that World of Warcraft: Battle for Azeroth is already setting records well before it releases. How? Well, it had a very nice diorama at BlizzCon. A very nice, very big diorama, one that featured a huge number of attendee characters individually printed in 3-D and arranged on the sprawling battleground between the Horde and the Alliance. And said “very big diorama” apparently qualified as the largest video game diorama ever at 1,300 square feet. That is a lot of individual characters in a single diorama.

No, your characters were not in the mix if you were not at BlizzCon. We’re sorry.

Meanwhile, StarCraft II has gone more or less completely free-to-play, and the team behind it has decided to take the opportunity to rather thoroughly troll the people behind Star Wars: Battlefront II’s notably less-than-free business model. This segues nicely into the game’s newest commercial, which couldn’t possibly have been made just to joke about that… but is still pretty funny all the same.

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Massively OP Podcast Episode 144: Harry Potter and the Deathly ARG

On this week’s show, Justin and Bree wrassle a mess of eastern mobile MMOs that are leaping onto the scene, imagine a world full of Harry Potter gamers wandering about, discuss SWTOR’s server merges, and take Guild Wars 2 to task for lockbox missteps.

It’s the Massively OP Podcast, an action-packed hour of news, tales, opinions, and gamer emails! And remember, if you’d like to send in your own letter to the show, use the “Tips” button in the top-right corner of the site to do so.

Listen to the show right now:

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WRUP: Helpful pointers about the inter-nets edition

Hello, one and all, and welcome to the inter-nets! The inter-nets, or as they are sometimes known the “world wide tubes,” are a fascinating place where you can meet people of many races, genders, religions, and sexual orientations while referring to them with deplorable slurs. Here are some useful tips about the inter-nets to make the most of your time here.

  • The inter-nets are a public place. Please be advised that other people can see what you are saying and respond to it. If you don’t want to discuss it, perhaps you should keep it to yourself.
  • The people you meet on the inter-nets are real people, with real feelings and wishes. Treat them the same way you would treat other people in the real world. Then, treat them better than that.
  • The inter-nets are the real world. If you are a nasty jerk to people on the inter-nets, that is who you are in the real world. If this is not the person you wish to be in the real world, do not act like it elsewhere.

We hope you enjoy your time within the inter-nets! As an associated diversion, please take part in this week’s installment of What Are You Playing, which can be found down below. Thank you, good night, and as always, keep surfing the computer waters!

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Final Fantasy XIV brings out patch 4.15 on November 21

At long last, Final Fantasy XIV Bards can put on a show with patch 4.15. The patch is slated for November 21st according to Twitter, and it will bring with it the new Perform action for Bards, letting you put together all of the songs you want within housing districts. The official preview even says that you can bring the realm to life with the sound of music, delighting any fans of Julie Andrews.

The new patch will also bring with it the new Rival Wings PvP mode, pitting two teams against one another with mech backup and all the fun tricks you’d want from a MOBA-style PvP option. You’ve got two weeks to prep up before the patch arrives, so perhaps you should practice a bit with your preferred job in PvP, which might even be Bard. That would tie everything together nicely.

Anyway, here’s Wonderwall.

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Massively OP Podcast Episode 143: BlizzCon strikes back

On this week’s show, Justin and Bree dig into the exciting news from BlizzCon, mull over the troubles at Marvel Heroes, mourn the passing of a great studio, and cover a handful of MMO updates.

It’s the Massively OP Podcast, an action-packed hour of news, tales, opinions, and gamer emails! And remember, if you’d like to send in your own letter to the show, use the “Tips” button in the top-right corner of the site to do so.

Listen to the show right now:

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WRUP: Is this what I wanted edition

So, for a very long time, I was one of the people crying out for making some of the many racial variants in Azeroth playable. It just makes sense. Now, World of Warcraft has added them… or is going to add them. Some of them. Some of the ones I don’t even particularly want, and some of the ones I’ve wanted for a long while. (And at least one that I never thought I wanted.) They’ve got new class matrices, they have different customization, they have a whole lot of different traits.

Is this what I wanted? I don’t know. It’s not quite what I wanted. But it’s close enough to what I wanted, right? I think I’m getting what I want. This isn’t like Demon Hunters, which I never really wanted until they were right here. But it’s also a weird feeling where I’m pretty sure this is what I wanted, except not entirely sure. I don’t know. Muse about it in What Are You Playing comments, why not?

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Massively OP Podcast Episode 142: The state of the sci-fi MMO genre

On this week’s show, Justin and Bree discuss the up-and-down week that was Star Wars: The Old Republic, fret over CCP’s studio closures, marvel at Star Citizen’s CitizenCon, and talk about the flurry of MMO releases as of late.

It’s the Massively OP Podcast, an action-packed hour of news, tales, opinions, and gamer emails! And remember, if you’d like to send in your own letter to the show, use the “Tips” button in the top-right corner of the site to do so.

Listen to the show right now:

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WRUP: World of Warcraft: The We Just Want Eliot To Come Back Expansion edition

Well, here’s our World of Warcraft expansion leak. Apparently, it’s titled World Of Warcraft: The We Just Want Eliot To Come Back Expansion. I think they’re courting me. The expansion brings in all of the subraces I want, including Eredar, and it’s introducing Wardens as a hero class? Oh, and they’re apparently like a fusion between Shaman and Paladin. That’s nice. Also, we’re getting player housing, no new levels, and additional artifacts for each spec.

Plus, they’re adding dance studios and a better character creator. Oh, and better lady Worgen models. Level scaling through the world, all content scales down to duos, and totems are back! Also, something called “nightmare druids” and “mechanical warriors.” Sounds pretty good; I’m curious about the “customizable giant robots.” Anyhow, let us know what you’re playing down in the comments because this is What Are You Playing.

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Massively OP Podcast Episode 141: Mouse invasions and elf butts

On this week’s show, Justin and Bree go trick or treating as only grown adults can: in a video game! The is also prim and proper talk of MMO expansion pre-orders, launch dates, mouse invasions, and the all-important ELF BUTTS. It’s quite the event, to be sure.

It’s the Massively OP Podcast, an action-packed hour of news, tales, opinions, and gamer emails! And remember, if you’d like to send in your own letter to the show, use the “Tips” button in the top-right corner of the site to do so.

Listen to the show right now:

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WRUP: Of balls and pins thereof edition

Why are pinball machines so expensive? All right, that one’s obvious, they’re rather elaborate things with lots of moving parts all wired up to sturdy tables. They should be expensive. But it’s insanely frustrating that there’s no real way to get the proper feel of a pinball machine without spending a couple thousand dollars on a large, heavy table that plays one game.

And even “plays” feels a bit overly generous, because this isn’t, like, a similarly expensive arcade cabinet. A pinball machine is a matter of frantically mashing flippers and hoping for rain as various things happen with only moderate control. It’s incredibly frustrating and it’s pricey and I want one, because all of the digital solutions don’t have the tactile feel that is literally half of the fun of these things.

In summary, someone needs to make an MMO variant on pinball. Let us know why that’s stupid in this week’s installment of What Are You Playing.

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Massively OP Podcast Episode 140: Dubious drops in LOTRO, FFXIV, and SWTOR

On this week’s show, Justin and Bree navigate the dubious updates that dropped in several major MMOs (as well as a few other ones that seem to have gone off OK). It’s practically an all-patch, all-the-time show with the addition of a couple of interesting listener emails regarding accessibility and crafting!

It’s the Massively OP Podcast, an action-packed hour of news, tales, opinions, and gamer emails! And remember, if you’d like to send in your own letter to the show, use the “Tips” button in the top-right corner of the site to do so.

Listen to the show right now:

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WRUP: Names I have used for MMO zones other than their proper names edition

Boregrimmar. Dorkshore. Strangle-me Vale. Dun Moron. Ironfudge. The Kvetchlands. Hillsbad Footfails. Poorgrimmar. Zangrymarsh. More Donuts. Fishguard. Palaran. Nar Shady. Lomsa Lemonsa. L.A. Nausea. Goopstaberg. Winderps. Valkurm Dooms. Fort Smellsba. Rolanberry the Headless Thompson Fields. Castle Ooze Troy. Snoregrimmar. Nar Shut Up.

Lizardtown. Camp Steaky-place. Tython, land of pythons. Ord Mantelpiece. Sith Seattle. Invincible Turtle River. The Lich King Summer Camp. The Boyz II Men Tree. Gay Planet. Shadowlord Fun Time Activity Zone. Kitty Jungle. Pirate Jungle. Crackton. The Alliance Lives in a Closet. Stormwind Red Light District. Cat Gas Park. Earth Space Duck. “Oops I Crapped My Pants” City.

And those are just the ones where my wife and I didn’t just add obscenities to the name for no reason, or referring to a zone in one game with the name of a zone from a completely different game. Let us know what you’re playing in the comments, this is What Are You Playing. Theoretically.

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