Are you the sort of insufferable dillweed who wastes everyone's time during a social gathering talking about how humanity should never have moved on from vinyl records or failure-prone game cartridges or whatever else makes you just insufferable instead of Amish? Then you should order our new series, Better Living Through Obsolete Technology! It's perfect for the change-averse weirdo who doesn't understand why no one has not programmed a decent MMO for the Commodore 64.
This comprehensive 18-tape VHS set with an additional audio reading 8-track recording and laserdisc companion series will guide you in the delicate art of yelling at computer salesmen, why scanlines are the best thing ever, and how to scold people for ruining your playback because they turned on a vacuum cleaner within the same time zone. To order, send a personal check (no money orders or PayPal) to the bottom of the trash can and leave your weekend plans in the comments for What Are You Playing this week.