One Shots: Deceptions or desserts

    
25

It’s that time of year again when strange little MMO players put on clever disguises, thrust their inventories at developers, and shout, “Deceptions or desserts!” At least, that’s what my alien progenitors instructed me before I came to your world.

Here is one of your semi-humans exploring the “house and horrors” of a game called Blade and Soul. It is currently unknown if the house is a malevolent entity that eats small beings… and if Utakata is passing through its digestive tract. Oh, the consternation!

“Look at all the happy people in their silly costumes, collecting candy and pretending monsters are just make-believe. How adorable,” said Hirku in Secret World Legends.

Hirku knows, my brothers and sisters. Hirku knows the truth.

I am not quite sure why the flora of your planet is so antagonistic toward the risen dead, but IronSalamander8 seems to relish their conflict.

“Perfect this week! I have a picture of Plants vs. Zombies: Battle for Neighborville’s Lawn of Doom event to share! They’ve decorated Giddy Park (the main hub) for Halloween and it looks great.”

My eyes are vomiting colors.

Of course, if you must celebrate this holiday by disemboweling rotund vegetables and then lighting their corpses on fire, Minimalistway has created a morbid shrine for your depravity.

“I find this simple decoration so beautiful, from All Saints’ Wake event in FFXIV.”

I do not think the pumpkin’s brethren would find it as beautiful. I think they would never stop screaming.

Insanity — temporary or permanent — seems to be a recurring theme of your dark holiday. I can not come up with a better explanation for why a human would voluntarily engage in what you call “jumping puzzles.”

“The entrance to Mad King’s Clock Tower in Guild Wars 2 jumping puzzle has also a certain je ne sais quoi!” said Miol.

Obviously, your speech centers have been affected by your mental breakdown.

I have been instructed by High Command that in order for your life to have continued purpose, you must be given a weekly screenshot challenge. So it shall be. This week, look to the celestial objects in your game worlds’ skies and share them with us all. Who knows? You may be viewing the glory that is my home of G’nxxxphfth.

Every week, One Shots shines a spotlight on the best community screenshots from your MMO adventures. If you have a great pic to share, email it to justin@massivelyop.com with the subject “One Shots.” Make sure that the picture is over 880px wide and comes with a description or story!
Advertisement
Previous articleThe Daily Grind: Are you still on board the Kickstarter MMO train?
Next articleNew World of Warcraft ‘leak’ continues to fan the flames of assumption for the next expansion

No posts to display

25 Comments
newest
oldest most liked
Inline Feedback
View all comments