A while back, we started collecting all our cozy, comforting, positive, happy stories under the “warm fuzzies” tag. This year, we turned it into its own column, celebrating the good in gaming, gamers, and gaming studios in Massively Uplifting. But we also have another tag… a darker tag. The “this is why we can’t have nice things” tag is the one we slap on all the posts we write about stories that make us go “what the actual fuck?” and “are you even kidding me right now?” and “am I entirely positive I am in the right hobby and job?” (I am, but these stories do make me question it some days.)
So since I’m having a fun time with these end-of-the-year lists, I’ve rounded up all the “why we can’t have nice things” posts from 2019 and am offering them up for the New Year’s bonfire. We’re abandoning them, with prejudice, whether they’re stories about hackers and banhammers, authoritarian regimes cracking down on pixel fun, pointless lawsuits, Kickstarter scams, really dumb patch disasters, or game studios behaving like they’re frat houses. Go ahead and look at the worst things that happened in and around our genre this year – and then leave them behind you where they belong. o7
Blizzard is investigating Overwatch team’s ‘social experiment’ hoax [Updated]
Just when you thought lockbox gambling couldn’t get any grosser
After telling Blizzard to cut spending, Activision pays $15 million bonus to new CFO
Fortnite is apparently fertile ground for doing crimes, like money laundering
Atlas hackers strike again with the return of the dreaded air whale
RuneScape boots player who streamed himself bullying a suicidal gamer
Facebook lawsuit reveals ‘friendly fraud’ tactics it employed against underage online gamers
Escape from Tarkov devs apparently abused DMCA to target more than one YouTube critic
A Hi-Rez staffer has been arrested for alleged solicitation of sex with a minor in major sting op
Activision-Blizzard Q4 2018: Activision-Blizzard posted record profits, layoffs begin anyway
Gamigo isn’t penalizing ArcheAge cheaters who exploited Erenor infusions
Villagers & Heroes has been hacked – time to change your passwords
The UK’s Fortnite Live event is another convention giving you a free hour in the ball pit; Epic Games takes organizers to court
Kotaku exposes the creeps of game streaming, plus the update on Elvine you didn’t want
Two weeks after Activision Blizzard’s layoffs, its stock price is barely higher than before the layoffs
Call of Duty swatter requests the minimum 20 to 25 year prison sentence
Confusing ports of One Hour One Life demonstrate the frustrations of generous public domain games
Indian police arrest 10 over PUBG ban
Epic addresses store roadmap, privacy; Steam finally confronts review bombing
Electronic Arts lays off 350 people from multiple teams, draws down presence in Japan and Russia
Reddit is aflame over the ban of a popular bug-exposing YouTuber from ARK Survival Evolved
Black Desert’s big banwave this week apparently had more than a few false positives
Call of Duty swatter receives 20 years in prison
Blizzard bribes female employees to track their sex, pregnancy, and moods
The Division 2 spots and patches out a homophobic slur hidden in in-game graffiti
‘Secret’ City of Heroes emulator operators address SCORE leak drama, rebut personal info database rumor
Heroes of the Storm player arrested for making terrorism threats in chat
Fortnite bans over a thousand accounts to preserve tournament integrity
Another crunch-ridden game studio exposed: This time it’s Fortnite’s Epic Games
Cox Communications is rolling out a new Elite Gamer ‘fast lane’ internet connection
Riot is trying to divert its employees’ gender-discrimination lawsuit to arbitration
Here’s why a Magic: The Gathering hall-of-famer was disqualified from Mythic Championship II
Fortnite disqualifies pro player from $30M tourney over collusion scandal
Over 777,000 Apex Legends cheaters have been banned as Respawn cracks down
Gamers warn that the AXS Mobile App needed to enter BlizzCon is ‘spyware level bad’
PUBG Mobile plans new ‘healthy gaming’ feature reminding you to take breaks
Guild Wars 2 temporarily disables map completion key rewards over teleport exploit
Elite: Dangerous player finds a program that lets you hack every aspect of your ship
Riot takes action against League of Legends esports team Echo Fox over allegations of racist abuse
Riot Games isn’t budging on labor dispute even after employee walkout
Dota 2 paywalls its Avoid Player feature by including it with its Battle Pass
Cheaters who were banned from a $30M Fortnite tournament win their way back in
California says Riot Games is refusing to fully cooperate with its gender discrimination investigation
Anthem’s Reddit cracks down on ‘aimless’ criticism
Twitch is suing unnamed parties over the flood of offensive content in the Artifact space
Star Trek Online’s Discovery Enterprise lockbox has captains in an uproar
EA absurdly argues video game lootboxes are ‘surprise mechanics’
League of Legends is blocked in Iran and Syria due to US embargo laws
Farewell, Atlas Reactor: Gamigo has officially sunsetted the first of its Trion MMOs
Lawful Neutral: TUG’s Nerd Kingdom is the Real Slim Shady
The Daily Grind: Should MMOs allow players to alter how other characters appear in their client?
Jordan bans PlayerUnknown’s Battlegrounds, plans to ban Fortnite and others
Ubisoft cracks down on chat griefers with Rainbow Six banwave
A lawsuit against Jagex for muting a player is thrown out in five days
New Frontier launches on Steam with the publisher that supposedly was not connected to the game
Exposé tracks how one dude fudged a whole company and swindled 25 devs over an MMO
Red Dead Online teases new roles as watchdog group questions Rockstar’s tax history
Conan Exiles disables avatar summoning – again! – after players abuse exploit to… dupe gods
The ESA’s 2019 E3 journalist database breach wasn’t at all a one-time thing
MMO Business Roundup: Threats on Square Enix, Netmarble’s weak Q2, and Steam’s Workshop scammers
Recapping the whole 38 Studios mess as Curt Schilling contemplates run for Congress
WoW Classic’s PvP server community is already at war over streamers
Death threats against Square-Enix management employees force the company to cancel tournaments in Japan
Apex Legends devs and gamers clash over Iron Crown monetization
Star Citizen reveals a non-functional $600 ship at a private function for its Concierge level backers
Former Elder Scrolls and Guild Wars franchise composer is accused of sexual assault
World of Warcraft: Classic’s inevitable goldsellers are using modern chat functions to advertise
EA’s infamous ‘sense of pride and accomplishment’ post now holds a Guinness record – for Reddit downvotes
E3 2020 wants more consumers, more celebrities, and to pay major media outlets to ‘control the message’
Steam users in France should be allowed to resell their games according to French court ruling
For Science: Study suggests racial stereotyping underpins campaign to blame real-world violence on video games
Australian police are investigating crimes linked to an Overwatch esports team
Physical power armor helmet from Fallout 76 is being recalled due to mold
Eternal Magic publisher denies accusation that it plagiarized WoW and Guild Wars 2, shades accusers
Blizzard bans Hearthstone esports player and fires casters over pro-Hong Kong protest
A World of Warcraft LGBT guild has been forced to change its name
Not So Massively: The Blizzard I loved is dead
How Pokemon Go company Niantic is collecting (and using) your life’s data
UK art studio accuses Kickstarted MMORPG Oath of incompetence and failure to pay for work
Fallout 1st is a new Fallout 76 sub that locks private world ownership behind a paywall
A gamer was killed after witnessing a robbery whilst playing Pokemon Go
Fortnite pro player is swatted live on stream during a Championship Series game
CS:GO stops letting players sell container keys due to their use in money laundering
US politician shades Blizzard over World of Warcraft toxicity
China is really adding that youth gaming curfew and block on sex and gore in games
A prominent FIFA competitor blows the lid off of a match fixing scandal involving several pro gamers
Fallout 76 dataminer is banned from the game after reporting an exploit
Star Trek Online’s Mudd’s Market pricing ignites a community firestorm
An MMO character ‘worth’ $1.4M was sold in China for $552
The Soapbox: Cross-play, console exclusivity, and why companies won’t play nice
EVE Online’s new HyperNet Relay reintroduces gambling to New Eden
US Congressman uses campaign funds for Steam games, man allegedly uses PS4 to sell cocaine
Kickstarted survival sandbox Day of Dragons’ early access launch is bogged down by drama
Google and Epic Games are squabbling over Fortnite’s Android fees – again
Final Fantasy XIV suspends a streamer for shaming another player live on his stream
Chronicles of Elyria postpones its unsold land sales with a date still to be determined
Want even more? Take a peek at Eliot’s other favorite tag, mature adults acting in mature and professional ways. Better yet, just cuddle up in the warm blanket of Massively Uplifting because let’s be honest, there’s only so much dumpster fire you can take. Bye, 2019!
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