WRUP: The fable of the turtle and the stockbroker edition

WRUP: The fable of the turtle and the stockbroker edition

Once upon a time, there lived a turtle. He lived in a marsh. He sat on logs and sunned himself, when he got too warm he stayed in the shade, he swam and he ate and had a generally standard turtle life.

Then one day, a stockbroker turned up in his marsh. “I am a stockbroker,” explained the stockbroker. “Let me tell you something, turtle, if you work with me you could own this entire marsh and then some. How would you like it if I set you up with an initial public offering which we can leverage into a high-yield set of funds to ultimately set up a diverse portfolio?”

At that point, the turtle swam away, because he didn’t understand what this man was talking about. Again, he was a turtle. The stockbroker was later located and placed in assisted living as he was trying to sell hedge funds to skunks. If you found this ending disappointing, please suggest a worse one in this week’s What Are You Playing.

Bonus question: What’s your favorite board game for playing during family time (that is, not necessarily played with people who are necessarily board game geeks)?

Andrew Ross (@dengarsw): More Pokemon Go when I brave the outdoors, and as much Animal Crossing New Horizons as I can. Still doing a major make-over on Nu Dereth. Also, is it weird that Animal Crossing is making me miss Landmark a bit?

For board games, Settlers of Catan is good. I feel like we have enough to do during our turns, it’s easy to understand, easy to customize, but I can also head to the bathroom without too much trouble most of the time.

Andy McAdams: Who knows what I’m going to be playing. I’ve been putzing around Elite: Dangerous and having a lot of fun. I also downloaded Star Wars: The Old Republic and subbed for a month because I haven’t played in a very long time, and its never a bad time to be a Jedi. Of course, I will be checking in to Animal Crossing too.

Bonus Question: No answer. My family wasn’t big on games.

Brianna Royce (@nbrianna, blog): I’ll be all over. So far this week I’ve been in City of Heroes, Star Wars Galaxies Legends, and Guild Wars 2. I think the weekend will be the same!

When I was a kid, my family had a standing pizza-and-board-game-night! Nowadays, not as much. Kids board games just kinda suck, and my littles are too little for more adult games still. My all-time favorite, though, is probably RISK or one of the Clue clones no one has ever heard of.

Carlo Lacsina (@UltraMudkipEX): More Final Fantasy VII Remake and some Final Fantasy XIV; my wife’s birthday is on April 20th and I’m trying to figure out the best way to spend it!

I’m not sure if this counts as a board game but I’m a fan of Avalon! I like how incredibly intense those conversations can get

Chris Neal (@wolfyseyes, blog): Satisfactory has had a recent update that adds fluids and pipework to manage, so I will likely be focusing on that. This will be interspersed with my usual Animal Crossing chores and some alt class leveling in Final Fantasy XIV. Yes, I do more than just roleplay in that game, believe it or not.

I have not played board games in ages, particularly since my husband doesn’t seem to have an appetite for them at all. The last board games I recall actively playing frequently were things like Mouse Trap and Crossfire, if that gives you any idea of how long it’s been.

Eliot Lefebvre (@Eliot_Lefebvre, blog): Some FFXIV and FFVIIR, plus a couple of other assorted projects here and there. Thankfully, the weather is supposed to be nice on Sunday, so I’m looking forward to a pleasant walk.

My family always really enjoyed playing Trivial Pursuit together, which generally worked fairly well, but a lot of my fondness there is more about association rather than the game itself. In terms of actual games that are good to play with non-board-game people, I find Apples to Apples (or, depending on the audience, Cards Against Humanity) is good for lighter fun, or even just the chaotic structure of Bananagrams.

Justin Olivetti (@Sypster, blog): Mostly I’m going to be digging hard into Fallout 76: Wastelanders this weekend. I’m actually having a really great time with it and can’t wait to share my impressions with you all! If I have extra time, I’ll be doing some Bingo Boffin quests in Lord of the Rings Online and living world stuff in Guild Wars 2.

Mia DeSanzo (@neschria): I am going to drop into Final Fantasy XIV this weekend. Otherwise, going to catch up on the housework we have been neglecting despite being home all the time. Things are just weird lately.

We are big fans of Apples to Apples, but my daughter got a game for Christmas called Cult Following: The One True Game that has been a big hit. (Those are more party games than board games, but close enough.)

Samon Kashani (@thesamkash): This weekend I’m all in on Starborne. My glob, Starborne. It’s the most addicted to a game I’ve been in years. It’s totally and completely out of control. If I weren’t homebound, it’d be a problem. Aside from that, I might get a bit of time in Guild Wars 2’s Adventure Box.

If we play family board games we usually go with something like Apples to Apples. It’s safe, kid friendly, and generally a fun time.

Tyler Edwards: Right now I seem to be consistently splitting my time between We Happy Few and the Reign of Terror Diablo II mod for Grim Dawn. I expect that to continue.

Bonus question: I haven’t had any significant contact with my family in a long time, but when I was a kid I loved Risk. Preferably the Lord of the Rings version, but I’ll take the vanilla version in a pinch.

Pierre, patron: I’m taking turns playing my two favorite games: The Last of Us and Final Fantasy VII Remake. As you can see, it’s mainly PS4 gaming, but what a treat. When I need a change, I play some of The Elder Scrolls Online. It’s amazing how much content the dev team has built for this very pleasant MMORPG, thousands of hours. What I really like about this one is the quest writing, even the secondary quests; each quest takes you on an adventure, many times long adventures, involving you in the life of so many NPCs, and making their life interesting for you even if you just met them. Great job! Combat is probably the most deceiving part, but when you have played MMOs for a long time as I do, you probably noticed combat is not really their forte. But it’s not an issue as you have a lot more to do in those games beside fighting.

Finally, as I require my weekly dose of shooter gaming, I go fight narcoterrorists in Ghost Recon Wildlands, sometimes co-op, sometimes playing solo. This game is so much better than Breakpoint, it’s very difficult to explain how Ubisoft managed such a great alchemy of gaming features in Wildlands and dropped the ball completely and failed mixing similar features properly in Breakpoint.

Bonus question: I’m not really into board games but for playing with family, old classics are probably my favorite ones; Cluedo and Monopoly come to mind immediately. For playing with friends (geeks mainly, I must admit), Zombicide is an excellent one as well as Junta… but only if you’re not too attached to your friends, as treason in that one can end friendships quite brutally. And you MOP readers, what’s up these days? Let us know in the comments and be safe, most of all. Cheers!

Every Saturday, join the Massively OP community and staff for What Are You Playing, our roundup of what MMORPGs and other games we’re hoping to play this weekend (with a bonus question or two for our amusement). Tell us what you’re up to! Go off-topic! And don’t forget to have fun!

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Fallout 76 and Minecraft are taking up most of my playtime this weekend. Im enjoying 76, but it may not last long. I bounce around games too much.

Codenames is a fun, quick tabletop game that will tickle your intellect ever so slightly. I recomend it if you have 6 or more online friends and Tabletop Simulator. You dont need that many people, but it plays better if you do


Took the plunge for FF7 Remake and getting my butt kicked on Normal because I’m bad at keeping attention to my health. Beyond that, Fallout 76 probably. Maybe some XIV or ESO or maybe TFT/LoL. Might give Valorant a try since I got an invite, idk. In general kind of haven’t been gaming as much and just been relaxing between working from home.

Bonus question: my favorite would probably be Clue, though usually Monopoly. Apples to Apples as well if you count card games.

Loyal Patron

I’m was looking for a new rpg and it was going to be a toss up between Witcher 3 and Divinity: Original Sin 2. Then I stumbled across Enderal: Forgotten Stories, a “mod” for Skyrim on Steam, and I’ve been playing that for the past few days. Strongly recommended.

I haven’t played a boardgame for about 25 years, but I used to enjoy Talisman back then.

Damon Anderson
Patreon Donor
Damon Anderson

So seems I survived what I would logically assume was COVID or maybe I had a minor case of the common cold and I just smoke too much, either way I am very lucky or maybe everything is just random chance or that karma stuff is true or perhaps I am now at one with the force or maybe I am simultaneously my own worst enemy and my own salvation and someday I’ll inevitably have to face the consequences of my own choices (smoking), grateful for lessons and friends tho. Humility, I think is the lesson for me to focus on. For gaming I have a lot of PS2 games to play, still working on Deus Ex, started Syphon Filter Dark Mirror (really cool), I am stumped on the first colossus in Shadow of the Colossus, but got it’s hp lower than I have previously last night, also the game store that delivers in town where I live dropped of Hasbro Family Game Night today so going to play that, something that’s simple and thoughtful is I think just right atm, and yes you can play board games digitally of course, although favourite board game ever was Axis and Allies also Risk. Highlight of the week tho is I got a budgie, it’s blue, very cute, seems very unsure in her new environment, likes Mozart more than U2 haven’t played her Chemical Brothers yet I think I will wait on that and stick with Mozart to foster serenity, change is always stressful. I would upload a picture but don’t know how… could probably figure it out but pretty sure everyone knows what budgies look like and the impulsive thought to do that is not really worth listening to cause I don’t have the time right now cause I really need another coffee and cigarette (not an endorsement for smoking, truest thing here but not but it is). “Be like water my friend” – Bruce Lee?

My D&D alignment is neutral good I took an online test so I know this for sure, look it up on bing and take it yourself is always good to understand yourself better, science.

IronSalamander8 .

Battle for Neighborville is still prominent for many reasons; still having fun, playing with friends, love PvZ, and so on.

TTS has been nice for my playtesting, just now in fact tweaked a faction that was doing too well, changed a key rule and re-tested them, and now they are performing in line so pleased with that.

R6 siege is a decent shooter when I want a little more realism than the PvZ shooters have.

We started playing Deep Rock Galactic now too. Pretty fun game so far.

As for the bonus question, it’s been many, many years since I had to play a family style board game, but Uno was the number 1 game at such events, so not very sad to not be playing in that environment.

Stay safe and stay healthy everyone!

Kickstarter Donor

I’ve been back to Neverwinter Online on my PS4 lately, and I’m having a blast, yet again.

It’s weird — I did not like Neverwinter Online when it released, but when I tried it again last year on my PS4, I found that all the things I disliked had effectively gone away.

(Primarily, the initial constant badgering that you pay them money. The fastest way to make me not want to pay for your game is for you to nag me about it constantly, and to try to force me to pay at certain random points. If you advertise yourself as “free to play with an optional cash shop”, then be that, and please shut up)

But yes, Neverwinter Online now behaves much like Cryptic’s other game, Star Trek Online — the cash shop and the lockboxes are always there, if you want them, but they’ve stopped trying to trick or trap players into spending money on either. All voluntary now.

And I’ve been having a great time! Tromping around Barovia (i.e. mythic Transylvania) fighting werewolves, and evil witches, and all kinds of other creepy baddies. It’s a fast, fun “action-y MMORPG” on my PS4, and it’s just what I need for quarantine relief these days.

Bonus Answer
: For whatever reason, board games bore the absolute shite out of me, mainstream (e.g. Monopoly or Risk) or specialty (e.g. the stuff you can buy at your local game or comic book store).

My boredom attempting to play any sort of board game is almost painful to me. People keep saying “Oh, but you’ll like THIS one!”, and I never do.

Even when I know, intellectually, that a board game is clever, and well-made, and fun, I still hate playing them. They bore me so much, I almost fall asleep.

I don’t know why I have this reaction, but board games and I are not friends, and I don’t know that we ever were.

Be well, all!



This week: The world currently seems to be divided into 4 different groups:

1) Ones who thinks viruses seep out of every wall and shadow. And if they could adorn a hazmat suit while living in a plastic bubble they would. Often finger wagging at others who don’t this. At the same time not being very helpful in to the rest of us who are trying to get by in this pandemic.

2) Ones who think this isn’t a problem at all. And who think it will all magically blow over. They are so adamant that they’ll group together in protest and demand government rescind all safety protocols and precautions. Or force them to consider themselves immune to said precautions. Some even believe by physically embracing others who have this is the best way to deal with it… /tinfoil hats

3) Ones who reasonable consider this is a problem for what it is. And abide by the safety protocols and precautions as they don’t want to get infected or their loved ones. As well as they want this pandemic to over as soon and realistically as possibly can. And they also don’t want tax an already over burdened health care system because that would be really bad.

4) Ones who exploit and profit from the crises for their own means. They don’t really care for the plight of others if it pimps their bottom line and/or power standings in society. And in doing, so make everything much more miserable for everyone than it already is…

“What’s your point, Uta?”

…I just think it’s important to see they dynamics going on in this crises. And in the hopes that with the new found time in embracing gaming we would all stick to the 3rd group. Try not let the 1st group get to you. Stay the Hell the way from the 2nd group, lol. And hope the 4th group is sent to a special place in said Hell in the process.

Also this week: More WoW & Soul.

Bonus Answer: Monopoly with family. D&D with friends. And both can be done remotely, I’ll add.

Have a great week and weekend! And pleas stay safe! /bows


I feel the need to do some creative building in Minecraft, that’s all.

Board games? i haven’t played one since i played Scrabble last time in mid-90s, these days i enjoy watching people playing them more than playing them.


Bortut the turtle told the stockbroker “but the marsh is not worth much and it is our home”, and then the broker explained that value is what other animals think something is worth, and not the actual value.
Bortut had always felt humiliated that rabbit Rundown always beat him in races, so maybe if he got rich and bought a Ferretrari?; and so he agreed to enter a companionship with the stockbroker.

Quickly the marsh was turned into Marsh Industries ltd, smart managers were hired to create “value” with promises of great things, and then Marsh Industries issued stock to raise more capital to create more “value”.
Business animals from the whole forest were excited about Marsh Industries, and the stock went up year by year.

The raven Rarr who had a birdseye view of everything said “this is crazy, it is just a marsh, and I have seen it with my own eyes”. We all know ravens are smart but also attracted to shiny things, so the Raven also invested to get even more shiny things”

The old owl Owlbur (no, that really is an ordinary name for owls, look it up on boggle dot kom) was the only one who just sat on his high branch and shook his head, and wondered why no one came to him for advice, being the wisest animal in the land.

Bortut had bought the Ferretrari but the winning over Rundown the rabbit felt like an empty victory, and so he set out new goals, he wanted to own ALL the marshes. As Bortut told his investors about the new goals they all cheered, gave him more money and the stock rose yet again.

Unfortunately, marshes quite quickly began to run out of fashion again, and the stock stopped going up. A major investor backed out, and the stock dropped quickly, and every animal with stock saw it and also wanted to sell to avoid losses.
More and more animals began to question if Marsh Industries was a solid company after all, and then during a shortage of grass seed, the stock market crashed, and Marsh Industries stocks became worthless overnight. Marsh Industries itself had invested heavily in its own stock as well as other stock, now found they were not able to pay the bills anymore, and went bankrupt.

A lot of animals lost their savings that day.
Why that marsh was ever valued that high, no one could explain, as now it was apparent to everyone that it was only some grass and swampy area.
The dolphins were the only one smart enough to see the stock trade for what it was, hollow value and promises. They knew it was only a game, and their stock assets were nothing but air, but played it wisely and got out in time … and it made them enough money to continue building their spaceship at the bottom of the ocean to eventually go back home one day.

The bank that took over the assets after the bankruptcy, now owns the marsh that used to be everyone’s. Bortut was too ashamed to ever return. The stockbroker moved on to new and better markets.
Now a new turtle sits on Bortuts old log, these days of course he has to pay the bank to sit there and to swim and eat, so he took a job at the turtle stew factory.
The owl sat on his high branch pondering where did all the value come from and where did it go ? was it ever there in the first place ? then he spotted a mouse and forgot about it again.

Kickstarter Donor

Brilliant! Thank you! :-)


Best boardgame for family time? Kingdom Death: Monsters. Nothing brings you together like having to fight crazed white lions, antelopes with gaping maws for their bellies, and finding out that your loved ones are a bunch of cannibals who love pottery and art, embrace the plagues, and decide its best to be addicted to flower-plant people to continue propagating your lineage…

At least I can trust I’m safe! So long as I’m insane, I’m Immortal! HAhahaha-haha… haha… haa… get me out of here…

That’s what I’d like to say. Really though, family doesn’t board-game much. Did a bit of ‘Life’ growing up, but not much else.

As for gaming…? Final Fantasy… I spent the last week going ham on Final Fantasy 7 Remake. I spent the better part of this past week going ham on Final Fantasy 7 Remake. And… Honestly? I’ll likely continue that trend into next week. Spent time suring things up in regular mode for what I could, started Hard Mode and spent a bit of time doing some easy grinding to hit lvl 50 and cap people… And now? Now I… I need to figure out how I’ll be dealing with the rest of the game on Hard Mode.

And if I’m not doing that? Well, ‘What We Do in the Shadows’ started its second season, and ‘Ascendance of a Bookworm’ has picked back up for its second half. So I might re-watch the first season of both all over again, just because they both are simply fantastic shows.

I might dabble a bit more into The Messenger though, and continue poking away at things in Final Fantasy 14. But then there’s… Final Fantasy 7 still… More…