WRUP: Extreme unicorn hammer tag edition

    
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Aw yeah.
ca. 1602 --- The Maiden and the Unicorn by Domenichino --- Image by © Alinari Archives/CORBIS

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All right, folks, it’s time for us to get on the game of extreme unicorn hammer tag! Trust me, there’s nothing like finding a unicorn, raising your hammer, and

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So let’s get started! First of all, select your hammer and your clothes carefully, as the first rule of hammer tag is ensuring no bits of

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and it can all be machine-washed. Next, find a unicorn. Ideally, you want one that’s pregnant, as most unicorns cannot

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But, of course, you may not have access to a stretch of woods without police officers, much less an area where no one notices you covered in

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After all that, wash the

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out of your hair, and let us know how it went in the comments of this week’s What Are You Playing!

Bonus question: What was the weirdest restaurant dining experience you ever had?

Andrew Ross (@dengarsw): More Pokemon Go to help me fight back the chub, some Animal Crossing because I love my town (and have a flower-infestation I should really deal with), and my console party host is having a virtual party, so at least some Jackbox games, woo!

Let’s see, weirdest internet-shareable restaurant dining experience. Oh! This was just a few years ago at a family friend’s wedding reception. Super small, just the groom’s immediate family and aunt, and my family friends, plus me (we’re fairly close). For those who don’t know, Hawaii has a huge Japanese tourist scene. Like, I’ve been to the “English” speaking parts of Hawaii, and also the Japanese parts. This was a Japanese part, but the MC at the reception really wanted to use her English I think. She mistook me and the other sister as a couple and then constantly checked in with me about how every dish of a course meal tasted. To the exclusion of almost everyone else. The bride and groom are pretty private, so they seemed a little relieved, but we all had a good laugh once we were out of earshot.

Brianna Royce (@nbrianna, blog): I’ve been back in Star Wars Galaxies Legends (I know, I suck at breaks). This week I’ve been baking droid and armor comps, so this weekend I’ll be turning those into droids and armor. But I’m trying to do as much in factory work as possible to save my clickin’ hand!

I can’t really think of any weird ones. Memorable, yes. Embarrassing, absolutely. How about amusing: I planned my wedding with a brunch buffet for the guests with all my favorite brunchy foods because I’m a breakfast person (it was a morning wedding/reception on a riverboat). But of course, no bride has time for eating, so I never got to taste it. Womp womp. Incidentally, I legit put a homemade Star Wars cake topper on our gourmet wedding cake, and hell yes I still have it.

Chris Neal (@wolfyseyes, blog): I suddenly got the bug to hop back in to City of Heroes: Homecoming and was reminded how much fun it is, so that is likely going to be a primary source of my gaming this weekend. Maybe a bit of Swords ‘n Magic and Stuff as well. Additionally, the Re-Reckoning has me wanting to reinstall and dive deeper into the vanilla Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning. But mostly it’s CoH for me I think.

I legitimately can’t say I’ve had a weird dining experience at a restaurant before. Nothing that interesting happens to me, I guess.

Eliot Lefebvre (@Eliot_Lefebvre, blog): Welcome to the craft slog in Final Fantasy XIV. Population: me. Maybe there will be time for other things, but there’s really no way to be sure right now.

Most of my terrible experiences dining out were more “traumatic” than “funny,” but the question was weirdest, and that was definitely when my wife and I stopped in a diner on the way to the Roger Williams Park Zoo and felt literally every single eye in the diner turn on us suspiciously. We had just seen Inception a couple days earlier and I swear, everyone in there from the staff on down was giving us the stink-eye. It was unnerving.

Sam Kash (@thesamkash): I think I’ll be playing Spellbreak this weekend. Nothing too hot popping off in my normal rotation of games and this one is fun and new. Mostly new.

I’m sure I’ve had a fair share of awkward dining experiences but the best for now happened at a nice little restaurant when I was on a date. It was kind of a fancy place and the food didn’t come cheap. Well being trendy in this case also meant all the tables were cramped close enough that you could basically touch elbows with the table next to you. As soon as our fancy onion rings arrived, the gentleman at the next table took a deep whiff and said, “wow, that looks and smells great, save one for me.” To which my date and I chuckled and agreed. Upon finishing the onion rings, this man turned, slightly aghast, and said, “oh so you didn’t save one, huh”. Umm, oops? We didn’t think he seriously wanted us to give him one, just one of those friendly things people might say. He eyeballed us a few times while we finished up our main course and overall made the rest of the meal a bit awkward.

Tyler Edwards (blog): I’ve started on the full version of Iron Harvest 1920. It definitely keeps you on your toes, even playing on easy, but I’m really enjoying it. The story’s really grabbing me, and it feels like it’s bringing a lot of really fresh ideas to the RTS genre. I’ve never played an RTS game where movement and positioning – not just of your army on the map, but individual units moment to moment – mattered so much. The skill cap on this game is enormously high.

Bonus question: Being who I am, I have no shortage of awkward, embarrassing, or otherwise unpleasant stories. I also used to live in Parkdale (a particularly colorful part of the city), and still visit there often, so I’ve had plenty of wild times there. One time while having lunch in my favorite Tibetan cafe, some new guys showed up and got into a fight right there – one guy got thrown into a wall. They were promptly – and very politely – thrown out.

Every Saturday, join the Massively OP community and staff for What Are You Playing, our roundup of what MMORPGs and other games we’re hoping to play this weekend (with a bonus question or two for our amusement). Tell us what you’re up to! Go off-topic! And don’t forget to have fun!
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Malcolm Swoboda

I keep taking too long at this! So FYI for anyone interested in my posts, I may be a day or more late. And I know some are :P.

  • Wizards Unite – Finished that Wizarding Weekend and they had to postpone updates, so Niantic put in a week of Dragon Week (some of the rarest foundables, often region specific) to celebrate a rough anniversary of Day of the Dragons last year. I’m not taking it so seriously so I got to be more casual than usual.
  • Last Cloudia – Trying to wrap up the gist of rewards for the first Phase of the current ranking event.. not counting challenge stages that I’m actually too apathetic to focus on. There’s now a second Phase that I need to get started on soon, at least for its story scenes. As I go, I’m nearing catching up on Hard story mission completions.
  • Tales of Crestoria – Basically finished another event! Or at least its exclusive stuff. Game is, as always, a mess, but its still a habit and I want more story to read/complete.
  • Distancing Hangouts – 1) Some more Remnant: From the Ashes, but less of it. I’m progressing through the 2nd world Rhom with my friend when I can, but taking it easier now. Maybe playing more the next week. What DID (humorously) upset me is my friend beating Earth’s ‘Riphide’ boss before me! And I think solo! How! She just smashes stuff! 2) A Terraria night after.. months? My friend master at it helped me get the Molten Pickaxe which I suppose is the best? Well I sure died a lot to mine it.
  • Logins: Another Eden, Magia Record (shutting down soon), Final Fantasy Brave Exvius, Blade xLord (shutting down soon; pushing through as much story as I can), Villagers and Heroes, EVE Echoes
  • Suspended: FFXIV, WoW, The Division, SWTOR, Magikarp Splash, Sub to my Adventure, Coromon

Partner has finished both Terran and Zerg campaigns in Starcraft Remastered, so he’s onto Protoss. Last I checked, he’s as far as Mt. Gagazet (maybe further) in FFX. And if I forgot to mentioned, yeah he basically finished Astral Chain.

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zoward

Haven’t been doing any MMO’s lately. I had been playing LotRO and DDO for a long time and kinda fell off the SSG train when my DDO main lost a ton of progress in a server rollback. I’m not sure when or where I’ll find myself jumping into another MMO. Right now I’m having way more fun (and putting in way more hours) playing Stardew Valley than anyone should be able to have in a $10 game with only one developer. If I ever meet the dev of this game in a bar, he’s on my tab for the night. Beyond that, I spent most of this weekend so far working on my RL garden.

As for the bonus question: As a gift for my mother-in-law’s 50th birthday, we bought her a surprise trip to Orlando, Florida to see Sea World and Walt Disney World. Our original flight was scheduled to leave Boston on September 13th, 2001, two days after 9/11 (as an aside, a friend of mine was aboard the first plane to hit the World Trade Center). Since every airport in the US was still shut down that day, we called our travel agent and agreed to go two weeks later. The flight was two-thirds empty. We spent the first night in the Renaissance Orlando across the street from Sea World. It was practically empty. Most of the staff had already been laid off. The stay included a free sit-down breakfast, which had the four of us in a large, posh hotel restaurant in which we were the only customers. There were six waiters circling our table as they had nothing else to do. It was supposed to be buffet style, but since there were no other customers, they allowed us to order all we could eat a la carte, and we obligingly ate like pigs. The bill came to exactly $0.00. I felt terrible. We left a $100 tip on the table, as we knew the waiters weren’t going to get much more than this in tips for the rest of the day.
The rest of the trip was very similar. Walt Disney World was destitute. Everyone had canceled and was afraid to travel. There were very few people, no lines for anything. My wife and I were trying to explain to my in-laws that the ride we went on five times in a row without waiting usually had a three hour line. Characters in the parks were standing around; we’d simply walk up and have our pictures taken with them. Even the usually packed character breakfasts had walk-in seating. Since we were some of the very few guests who had traveled there from out of state, we were treated like visiting royalty. Restaurants would wheel out a free birthday cake for my mother-in-law and the staff and characters would circle around and sing Happy Birthday – every night of the trip! At our Disney hotel, they left gratuity gifts – I mean, substantial stuff, like a Disney-themed alarm clock – on our beds after our rooms had been cleaned. It was surreal. My wife and I didn’t go back to WDW until we had kids and they were old enough to enjoy it. My in-laws thanked us for what they said was the best trip of their lives!

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Sorenthaz

FFXIV, maybe some Marvel’s Avengers, and maybe some League of Legends. Also probably some naps because I’m bad at sleeping properly on my days off.

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Bryan Turner

Still playing ESO, got caught up on The Boys.

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Toy Clown

I’m writing this with a much lighter heart! My time was mostly in FFXIV with a side of GW2.

FFXIV: Around a year ago I was shattered by an experience in an MSQ roulette that turned toxic, aimed at me. I wasn’t getting one of the mechanics and was playing White Mage. I felt so awful afterward that I canceled my sub and stopped playing healers for good. Cut to recent, it laid heavy on me how I walked away like that, taking in what those people said to me, carrying it around for near a year. I had to do something about it and resubbed a bit over a month ago and messed around with different classes. I thought it would be Summoner. Got 80, geared as much as I could, and started watching youtube strats. Mid-stride I went with Dancer. Finally, beat that #$(@#& trial and the elation I feel is wonderful. Not only that, I feel like I’ve found the class I most enjoy now. It feels like all of that negativity washed away. This is why I don’t treat people badly in games because we can cause unnecessary trauma to others and it’s a rough road getting back again.

GW2: I’m taking a lighter approach on the game, but still ridiculously happy to be playing again. This week I learned how to farm up a weekly Black … thing key (forgot what it’s called!), finished getting ascended accessories for the swap from conditions Scrouge to power Reaper, and started the collection for the Roller Beetle. I had enough of those scraps to get an appearance kit (wow, I’ve forgotten the lingo in this game!) and reworked my character’s looks. It’s nice to see they’ve added that scrap system as I can happily spend less cash on the game now. I did buy the anniversary pack where you get some account unlocked once a week for four weeks and sitting on several unlocks I’m afraid to use until I unlock the random crap on my account first!

Bonus Question: When I lived in Australia, my husband and I made friends with a Vietnamese couple and the four of us enjoyed going out and eating at different restaurants. What I enjoyed most is everyone shared their food, putting the plates in the middle of the table and everyone could try all of it. That’s vastly different from American culture where we’re not exactly taught to share our food!

We ended up at an all-you-can-eat place one day and I was jokingly complaining about how I couldn’t put much food away, making a buffet seem wasted but here was this tiny Vietnamese lady, going back for thirds, THEN for desert! I asked her how she was fitting all the food in her stomach! She motioned to me as she stood, reaching for her purse and said, “Come with me.” We went to the bathroom after she grabbed a cup of water and showed me this special tea she uses to purge her system so she can eat more food.

She shared some with me and it ended up being the most miserable I’ve been in a long time! With my body not being used to it, I started purging, unable to make it to the bathroom in time. I was horrified and went to wait out in the car after dragging a blanket out of the trunk to sit on. It just kept hitting me and went another couple of times before we made it home. By the time it had passed through my system, I had spent most of the night on the toilet and was worn out the next day and slept it off as much as I could.

I learned the hard way not to indulge in things like this again!

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Toy Clown

Forgot to add a picture from FFXIV!

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Ashfyn Ninegold

Kingdoms of Amalur Re-Re might have disappointed those who expected the High Heavens of graphical remakes, but the remaster brightened my week considerably. Playing my favorite Chakram spinning, arrow shooting Universalist build before I try something I’ve not played before, Sorcery & Might.

The Last Epoch is just a delight of an ARPG. Pretty much exactly what I’m looking for in gameplay, QoL and skill and passive trees. I measure it up against PoE and despite PoE’s many years more in development, LE is gaining ground.

Finally, Pathfinder:Kingmaker has kinda stolen my heart. Unlike just about every other RPG I’ve played, I actually read all the text, all the conversations, everything. I fret over my choices to improve and build my kingdom and battle the evil trying to undo all my Lawful Good works. Baldur’s Gate III is going to have a hard time prying me away at the end of the month.

Bonus: I have a lot of very pleasant, fond memories of meals with friends, families and colleagues. Would the meal at San Francisco’s famous (and now departed) Hong Kong Restaurant qualify as weird, I wonder? We had a great meal and much good conversation. When the staff was clearing away the empty dishes, we looked at each other and said, “Can we do that again?” and re-ordered the entire meal and ate it again. Yes, it was fun being young and silly.

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Utakata

This week: Welp…got the first of my 1 or 3 Dead Cities sketched done…

…and I’m not happy with it. And to a point I might just do it all over again. >.<

But enjoy! I'm sure it's much better than reading me rambling on about politics. So see image attached. (I think I gave a winded explanation about back a few weeks ago.)

Also this week: We're not so The North this year. Although congrats Celtics on your hard earned win last night. Hope you guys take it all the way! /bows

And finally: 3 more levels before I can call BfA "completed" in the anecdotal.

Bonus Answer: I'm too old to remember it's name..but it was very jungly. And had a lot of jungle drinks and food. I think my digestive system survived it though… o.O

Have a great week and weekend folks! And stay safe! <3

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Minimalistway

Going to play some Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning, and trying to finish Loremaster for Northrend, i’m level 120 but some quests are infuriating because of the low drop-rate, i kill the zone and i still can’t collect the last quest item i need, and players did this at level in Wrath?!

Bonus: sorry, nothing comes to mind, my life is boring :-)

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Utakata

No, your restaurant life is may not be as exciting, I’m pretty sure other aspects of your life are more interesting.

And keep in mind, not-boring is not always good. :)

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IronSalamander8 .

We’re playing through Grim Dawn but I think my days of playing these ARPG Diablo like games are coming to an end, it’s just not that interesting to play for me anymore as it’s become very tedious to play and I’m just looking to getting it over and done with. With BG3 coming soon (EA anyway, which I may get), my interest in this game is lower than normal.

Working on that Paladins season pass, only 18 levels to go.

Questing in GW2 again, I may have everything done but still enjoy the game a lot, and with BfN not getting upgrades, I’m still playing it but mostly to get the last few things unlocked and to level everybody up. I really hope we get a new PvZ shooter someday.

Speaking of BfN, the Garden Warfare Reddit has been a bit of mess ever since BfN launched as some hate it, some love it, and some of us like it, flaws and all, so are not happy about it being cancelled and the pic below I linked sums up the general mood quite well.

Bonus Question; I’m not really sure. I actually don’t go out to eat that much so nothing exciting I can recall.

Have a great weekend!

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Utakata

*The pigtails where hoping there was another sketcher on the MOP board*

…sorry for your game’s maintenance mode designation. :(

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Danny Smith

I’m playing some WoW Classic again. At launch i recreated my main but when i had the loremaster achievement pop the day it came in that was largely a “i did all of this before” and i fell off hard. But i found my old WoW TCG cards and there was this one ‘Agaman Mills’ card that reminded me that my original 30 day trial character back in Vanilla was a Forsaken since i mained Undead in Warcraft 3 and that was my teenage brain [AESTHETIC] bait.
So i rolled a Forsaken Rogue with leatherworking, the two things i never touched in vanilla because i was into plated warriors and clothy wizards and felt leather users were a nonecommital intermediate or something as a kid. But nowadays i default to the stealthy rogue in every rpg that allows it so thats just me or the times changing i guess. They are currently level 20 and boy has it been interesting to see the Horde side pre Cataclysm and how very not Sylvanas’ horde they are. It really feels in retrospect like the horde just lacks the continuity of the alliance overall but at the same time you can see things like normal humans in the undericty with the title “X’s mindslave” and think how the ‘innocent, unjustly treated rejects banding together” idea was always a little wishy washy even from the get go.

Also did i take a 40 minute trek from undercity to org to ratchet to booty bay to westfall just for a Defias Rogue mask?

Yes. Yes i did.

I also decided to take some time off my main in FFXIV to see what the new cut down 1-50 is like. I rolled up a potato Arcanist in limsa lominsa on monday and by wednesday was a level 49 summoner in Mor Dhona doing the quests leading up to Castrum Medidianum. So yeah, boy they cut that down. I think the pre Garuda stuff is now worse than Pre Titan to be honest. Its also funny to see stuff like you don’t need thousands of Grand Company Seals to get your chocobo you just do one dungeon roullette and maybe a guildhest and jobs done. Its very fast but also interesting to just see how different the starting routes are. Back in 2012 or whenever it was i started in Uldah which introduces you to characters like Thancred and Nanamo very early but if you play as someone from Limsa Lominsa characters like those and Tataro are barely there and between 25-50 just kind of vanish entirely. Considering how they became the ‘core party’ of this mainline final fantasy release to a degree its crazy to think you can start in one location over another and just get in my opinion a worse experience.

Beyond those two eating up my time i’ve picked up a few jrpgs i missed last gen like NAtURAL DOCtRINE, Fantasy Life and a revisit to Breath of Fire V: Dragon Quarter to dip into during the pre next gen malaise in releases. When you are utterly burnt out on the open world meme theres honestly not much catching my interest lately.

But being a big tabletop fan i did pick up Necromunda, which sadly i hear is kind of a let down, but also the Alan Wake dlc to control. Its funny that i beat it twice as i really love everything Rememdy does, usually, but dont like control but the moment it introduces the mechanics and story from Alan Wake i’m enjoying it a lot. Maybe it was just an art style change i didn’t enjoy?

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Danny Smith

Although speaking of Necromunda the game might disappoint but thats just been an excuse to drag more friends into the world of the Underhive IRL instead!

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IronSalamander8 .

I’m painting up some Monsterpocalypse stuff right now. I haven’t painted in easily 20 years as I stopped playing Warhammer a long time ago. I was paying a friend to paint some of it but it’s taking forever and isn’t exactly cheap so have been back it at, slowly but surely!

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Danny Smith

I tried to get into that but outside the northern united states privateer press is kind of a terrible company and never restocks ever. I think i got the last destroyer and defender starters in the uk i could find when they came out. Its a fun game but the company has suffered massive brain drain and industry rumour is they flopped Warmachine to hard they are trying to urgently get into skirmish games with things like Riot Quest and Warcaster to avoid full chapter 11 bankruptcy so i felt like scrounging what monpoc stuff you can find outside the states was a fools errand when its probably not going to be around in a year.

I would recommend GW contrast paints if you are new, they aren’t a solve all solution but for bases they can be pretty useful, especially on the organic stuff.

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IronSalamander8 .

I had heard it was rough to get their stuff outside of the Americas which is too bad, as I’ve been able to get stuff here in the states really easily, locally and via online stores. I’ve gotten a ton of Riot Quest stuff too and he’s painting those for me right now. I love the smaller scale skirmish stuff a lot after needing so many figures for a WFB army.

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Danny Smith

From what i understand they tried to emulate Games Workshops tactics that were so bad GW forced out their CEO and completely turned around their business and didn’t have the userbase or brand to turn it around and a bunch of higher ups jumped from PP to other companies.
I noticed it was real bad when my local independent stores not only stopped stocking PP but also removed their own models from the painting cabinet and treated it like a shameful thing.

Crudities in it aside this image is usually the go to to explain what happened to PP and it sucks because monpoc already died once already.

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IronSalamander8 .

That certainly doesn’t sound good. I never even heard of PP until about 5-ish years ago and I had swore off miniature games a long time ago, mostly from how bad GW was. The local stores here in the Milwaukee area sell a lot of their stuff (War Machine mostly), and see a lot of tournaments when at our Protospiel meetups. I got some of the Monsterpocalypse stuff on the shelves while testing and picked up some just before the quarantine and got more online. It sounds like they need to clean up their act and quickly.

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Danny Smith

To be honest PP started kind of sceevy with their infamous ‘page 5’ that makes it seem like “That Guy” as a stereotype is their target audience.

GW on the other hand has actually driven off many of its ‘grogs’ as they get called in their massive turnaround since age of sigmar and the like. Warhammer Underworlds is a simple and cheap game thats very popular, warcry and necromunda are the skirmish equivalents and 40k 9th edition and age of sigmar 2nd edition are specifically designed to have smaller games be viable with their new rules and game modes.

I like a lot of PP models and a few games but they really feel like a relic thats struggling to keep going.

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IronSalamander8 .

Wow, that ad is terrible. I didn’t have a horse in this race till March of this year, and do like MonPoc and Riot Quest, but this kind of stuff is a major turn off.

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Danny Smith

Thats not an ad. Its the first page in the core rules to Warmachine…

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IronSalamander8 .

Wow…

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Jack Pipsam

Looks awesome!