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WRUP: The Peter & Gordon world transfer corollary sheet edition

To whom it may concern, Thank you for your interest in this brave new existence of an alternate reality. Before the transfer is complete, please...
Yeah, no.

WRUP: Tips for being less boring edition

All right, this week's What Are You Playing is ready to go! Serious life advice about how to be less boring, let's do...
You were hoping for a picture of Tgek'dmal, I know.

WRUP: Small shopping centers I have known and how they would deal with the spite of Tgek’dmal edition

Fox Run Mall: Soothing atmosphere coupled with a poor layout and an unclear differentiation between the larger area and the proper Fox Run Mall...
weedle weedle weeeeeeee

WRUP: Dance Dancer Revolution walkthrough as spoken by your terrible college boyfriend edition

Up arrow, up arrow, down arrow, left arrow, left arrow, right arrow, left arrow, down arrow hold, up arrow, left arrow, left arrow, left...
Save it, doppelgangers!

WRUP: How to safeguard from doppelgangers edition

All right, people, it's time to keep your eyes open for doppelgangers. In this article, we're going to let you know about the secret...
Pinch.

WRUP: Lies I have told to myself in the past week and when I realized that they were lies edition

"This week I am going to take the time to really cook this meal in a way I've never tried it before." Lasted until...
shell

WRUP: The fable of the turtle and the stockbroker edition

Once upon a time, there lived a turtle. He lived in a marsh. He sat on logs and sunned himself, when he got too...
hotline bling

WRUP: Why I stole your cell phones and what I did with them on May 14th, 2013 edition

Ryan Neibler (44) of Oceanside, Long Island: It was very important that I text my best friend a list of wombat facts I had...
This picture is about horses.

WRUP: Song listing for Andrew Lloyd Weber’s next musical ‘Horses’ edition

Overture: several actual horse neighing sounds are played while the actors sit and vape on the stage. One of them occasionally says "horse" but...
It's a car.

WRUP: How to change a tire edition

First step, you should find a tire. This part is easy. Cars usually have several of them. Their owners tend to get mad when...
They exist.

WRUP: Unfairly rejected suggestions from my Pangolin Improvement Seminar edition

Sounds made: Car horn honking. Lightsaber noises. Screeching metal. The entirety of the Barenaked Ladies song "It's All Been Done." Cate Blanchett gravely saying,...
stuff

WRUP: Talk to your children about scrod edition

You should talk to your children about scrod. Not because it's a new issue. They're not going to be asking you any questions about...
Mayonnaise is funny

WRUP: Three directors whom I suspect of filling my personal belongings with mayonnaise edition

Sir Ridley Scott: On five separate occasions I have seen Sir Ridley Scott running away from my mailbox with mayonnaise dripping down his chin...
Disappointed

WRUP: Son edition

Son. Child. Offspring. Descendant. Genetic payload. Youth. Boy. Boyo. Scion. Youngling. Lad. Squire. Successor. Heir. Offshoot. Spawn. Additional family member. Post-pregnancy. Kid. Sport. Slugger....
Wow, that was truly a Star War

WRUP: Famous last lines from movies edition

"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." -Rhett Butler, Gone With The Wind "Hasta la vista, baby." -T-800 ("Uncle Bob"), Terminator 2: Judgement Day "Frankly,...

WRUP: Restrictions placed on you as the Trash Lord of the Mole People edition

RULE the FIRST: Under no circumstances are you to smear your subjects (moles) in mayonnaise, Thousand Island salad dressing, or olive oil made within...
Loser

WRUP: Complete works of Ozymandias to look upon and despair edition

Now That's What I Call Music (Ancient Societies Edition) Please note that at the time he created it, it was not tagged as "Ancient...
Aqueduct

WRUP: Municipal edition

Municipal. La municipale. Correct: Diagonal. Fish. Metric. Booger. Pants. Nighttime. Incorrect: Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred....
Hello, friend!

WRUP: Mikhail, the first vendor you see in town edition

Hello, friend! Would you like to trade? You'd like to sell? Seventeen ? Very good, here's your money! May you find good fortune in...
It's a car.

WRUP: Advanced street-crossing techniques edition

The Backwards Banana: The... the what? What the heck is this? What do you want me to type here? Are you supposed to backflip...

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