Lesson 1: Chewing
First, insert the object to be chewed into your mouth. Make sure that it is small enough to fit inside of your mouth. Then, close your jaws around… wait, no, that’s a rock. That is a rock. Take that out of your mouth, it’s going to – and, yes, you’ve chipped your teeth. All right. Let’s step back.
Lesson 0: Identifying things
All right. That hard oblong gray object? That is a rock. It helps if you learn what various things are before interacting with them. Rocks aren’t food. You want food. Food is what you want to eat. You put food in your mouth and chew that, and…
Why are you picking up the rock again? We just talked about this!
Lesson -1: Remembering things
When something happens, you can remember it. It means that… it means… look, I can’t explain remembering things to you, all right?! This is a basic part of how the human brain functions! If I explain it to you but you don’t know how to do it you won’t remember it anyway!
Lesson 2: Leaving a comment in What Are You Playing
Oh, forget it. I’m in too bad a mood now.
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Andrew Ross (@dengarsw): ​Pokemon Go’s Community Day has got my group excited, so that’ll probably turn into a most-of-the-day affair. I’m hoping to get in more Monster Hunter World too, but with an upcoming trip, relatives, and taxes looming over my head, it might not happen.
Brianna Royce (@nbrianna, blog): Probably the same for me: Guild Wars 2 and Ultima Online. The piece on Stardew Valley last week made me want to dig that back out too, which would be silly because I should wait for multiplayer, but maybe it’d drag me out of this winter funk.
Eliot Lefebvre (@Eliot_Lefebvre, blog):Really, my problem is not finding things to do, but finding space to fit all of it in over the weekend. Between Final Fantasy XIV, World of Warcraft, and single-player stuff, my cup runneth over.
DK, patron: This week I bought a year’s worth of stimpacks for Heroes of the Storm, so I’ve been getting that game in my play more often than normal. Also banging my head against Star Citizen again which has me questioning my sanity. I’ve been mucking around with the Staxel server, but I’m not playing it much at the moment. We canceled our Divinity: Original Sin 2 static session so I could do a Discord video call with the gang as well, though we might make that up tonight. Otherwise, I’m lamenting that Star Trek Discovery is over, but the finale brought tears to my eyes; strongest first season of a Trek series since the original, in my opinion! Finally, Lian has us gearing up for RIFT’s Prime servers this week, which has us getting very nostalgic over the pros and cons of RIFT vanilla back in the day.
Your turn!
