We sent this message back in time from 2056 in the hopes that someone could avert this horrifying future. E3 grew so slowly almost no one realized what was happening until it was too late. E3 2049 started in June of 2050, because E3 2048 lasted the whole of that year and well into 2049. It’s been raging for six years now. Six years of unplayable demos, promises about titles that will radically change before launch, plastic smiles on presenters, and hideous, unconscionable attempts at being hip.
And Nintendo is still promising things that aren’t going to actually come out for half a decade. Their fans insist that they’re doing well.
You can change this now. You can stop the spread of E3 as it keeps covering more days. Stop it before we are all lost in this barren wasteland. Also, make sure to take part in What Are You Playing, because that’s how the aliens decide who get the laser eyes. Yeah, that’s 2033. That year was pretty wild anyway.
Andrew Ross (@dengarsw): It’s the start of E3 coverage, so I may get to play some Anthem on Saturday. The other conferences are less hands-on, so I’ll probably just do some Pokemon Go since it’s another water festival, and there are so many shiny whales! My harpoon is ready, but after buying an ultra box for the third event in a row, I may need to throw myself on it! If only Niantic had released Squirtle Squad this time!
Brianna Royce (@nbrianna, blog): Definitely Trove, but I’m also doing one of those Justin-inspired play-all-the-things where I go through a bunch of stuff on Steam and test it out. So far I’ve done several games, including a couple of mini-MMOs, so that’ll be fun to talk about on the podcast!
Eliot Lefebvre (@Eliot_Lefebvre, blog): Aside from working on my last alt (out of character slots) on Final Fantasy XIV and finishing up my Final Fantasy XI adventure, I’m also going to be continuing on in Granblue Fantasy; hit a really smooth patch and I’ve been flying up, so best to keep up the momentum.
Justin Olivetti (@Sypster, blog): It’s a post-apocalyptic weekend for Justin! Fallout 4 and Fallen Earth are both getting some play by me, for no obvious reason whatsoever. No sirree. Just a coincidence. Also, Star Trek Online’s expansion just landed and I should probably get around to doing that. Think they will include the apocalypse?
MJ Guthrie (@MJ_Guthrie, blog): I plan on spending time building this weekend — in Conan Exiles and in ARK: Survival Evolved. Also, I will likely also be building with Duplo blocks! After finishing up the South African storyline, I also want to go back and finish up my completion of the earlier zones in Secret World Legends. With the rest of my time I plan to check out the the gardening/farming sim that is My Yard.