Good news, Splatoon 2 fans, you’re getting a content update on December 5th! The bad news is that it’s the last one you’re getting ever forever, so savor it. Yes, the final update is bringing with it five new weapons and two new abilities, and from then on you’ll be left to play in the same state forever while the game enjoys the long yawn of its maintenance mode.
What? No, no game would ever continue offering content patches in maintenance mode. Don’t be ridiculous.
The actually somewhat better news is that players can still expect Splatfest events and bug fixes for a while, it’s only the actual content that will no longer be arriving. Which is still a pretty good lifespan for a game that launched back in July of 2017, so let’s pour out a paint can in celebration. Although probably not on a street corner, the city might get mad about that. Vandalism and all.