First, I come into your home. You let me into your home, yes? My name is good; you do not need to know it. Do not worry about the hammer. The hammer is not for you. In the old country, I am famous chef. They tell me to come into their house in the old country. Yes, you let me into your home now. You have an apartment, not a house. Is same difference. We cook well.
Today we cook beef.
Our second step is open your fridge, and I begin to make with the smash-smash-smash of all your shelves. Everything in your shelves. Yes, friend, this is how we cook in the old country! You have egg? I go tappy-tappy-tappy and then smashy the egg with hammer! It will be made good, do not worry! You like the shelf. Shelf is important part of beef. Must smash more of your refrigerator!
Now is no more refrigerator. Here is crossbow. Our next part is stopping the Feeding Wolf. He is attracted by smashed refrigerator and I am leave door open to apartment. Be strong! You can hear him growl. Rest of recipe is in comments of What Are You Playing. No, the wolf will not attack me. Good luck, friend! The old country.
Bonus question: What’s your favorite weekend morning ritual?
​Andrew Ross (@dengarsw): The exercise games will get some attention, as will Pokemon Violet and Splatoon 3, but Orna has gotten more playtime as of late thanks to Halloween bonuses and me discovering some reworked mechanics.
I don’t really have weekend rituals. It’s more like if I’m going to work in the morning or stay up later to get stuff done. And then there’s whatever my plans are if I’m not doing (a lot of) work in the morning. Maybe showering? Or enjoying post-shave baby-smooth skin?
Brianna Royce (@nbrianna, blog): Lord of the Rings Online for me. Still trekking my Hunter through Beorning Land, and I rolled a River Hobbit Mariner, so I’m playing around with that. It’s… fine so far? Not compelling, not awful.
The only thing I really do differently on weekend mornings is not wake up to an alarm. Man I hate waking up to an alarm.
Chris Neal (@wolfyseyes, blog): I’m being semi-pressganged into peeking at Warhammer 40,000: Darktide’s class overhaul update, but once I’m done doing that there will be some Final Fantasy XIV, Void Crew, and probably a little bit of Lord of the Rings Online, as well as a bit of time in Black Desert.
I don’t really have many morning rituals but I will say that the smell of coffee coming up in my moka pot is really lovely to experience first thing in the morning. Seriously, though, if you’re a coffee lover you owe it to yourself to get one of these things. As well as some high quality coffee.
Eliot Lefebvre (@Eliot_Lefebvre, blog): Still plugging away at the FFXIV patch (as always, it was meaty) and also probably finding myself tooling around with some single-player stuff. I had my annual World of Warcraft expansion dream that will probably be cooler than the actual expansion, but it does still evoke a powerful nostalgia.
My favorite morning ritual is making eggs and toast. However, these days my normal morning ritual is crying. So, you know, stick that somewhere in your mind prison.
Mia DeSanzo (@neschria): I have company this weekend, so I will be playing hostess.
Sam Kash (@thesamkash): I’ll still be rocking and rolling through Harry Potter: Magic Awakened but I think I need something else to play too. I’m considering some New World but I might wait another week for that sheen to rub off the new expansion first. It may be time to give Marvel Snap a shot.
Bonus: Oh this is easy for me. It’s definitely playing games on the Xbox. I typically don’t play it during the week since I would rather hang out with the family, but weekend mornings are pops’ turn on the system.
Tyler Edwards (blog): Queues permitting, I’ll be playing more of the New World expansion. Leveling riding is surprisingly soothing.
Bonus question: The same thing I do every morning, Pinky.
Every Saturday, join the Massively OP community and staff for What Are You Playing, our roundup of what MMORPGs and other games we’re hoping to play this weekend (with a bonus question or two for our amusement). Tell us what you’re up to! Go off-topic! And don’t forget to have fun!
