STEP 1: Assessing the world
Does the world appear to have gone crazy?
If YES, go to Step 2
If NO, CHECKLIST COMPLETE
STEP 2: Assessing the cause (mechanical)
Can you see a device that appears to be causing the world to go crazy, usually metal and with blinking lights?
If YES, go to Step 5
If NO, go to Step 3
STEP 3: Assessing the cause (biological)
Is the whole world flocking around a particular individual with an eerie appearance and either wall-faced stoicism or constant laughter?
If YES, go to Step 6
If NO, go to Step 4
STEP 4: Assessing the cause (extraordinary)
Are you aware of any mysterious objects that have fallen to the world from outer space, emerged from deep underground, or unexpected portals?
If YES, go to Step 7
If NO, go to Step 8
STEP 5: Deactivating the device
Attempt to deactivate the device, either through pressing buttons, ripping out power sources, or flipping switches. Has this fixed the issue?
If YES, CHECKLIST COMPLETE
If NO, go to Step 6
STEP 6: Destroying the cause
Find the nearest heavy object and attempt to use it to reduce the source of the madness to its component parts. Has this fixed the issue?
If YES, CHECKLIST COMPLETE
If NO, go to Step 7
STEP 7: Leaving
Get in your car and go somewhere else. Just keep driving until everything is fine. CHECKLIST COMPLETE.
STEP 8: Assessing the cause (self)
Is it possible that the world is fine and you are crazy?
If YES, go to Step 9
If NO, go to Step 1
STEP 9: Potato
If YES, CHECKLIST COMPLETE.
If NO, go to Step 1
Bonus question: Is there a movie you loved as a kid that you can’t stand now?
Brianna Royce (@nbrianna, blog): I’ll be in Guild Wars 2 this weekend for sure. Good thing I like the Charr in this game because this episode is all Charr, all the time. I’ll be poking into Star Wars Galaxies Legends too for some vendor restockage.
Space Camp, fam.
Eliot Lefebvre (@Eliot_Lefebvre, blog): Between wrapping up some long-running projects in Final Fantasy XIV and trying out the launch version of Astellia Online (well, headstart launch, at least), I’ll be pretty busy. Which is good, because I’m also entertaining this weekend and heading to Mystery Science Theater 3000 Live. So… yeah. Busy enough.
Oddly, the movie I just can’t stand to watch any longer isn’t about the movie being bad, even though it is. See, when I was younger a video store that my father and I frequented had one animated film that I found utterly fascinating. Even as a kid I recognized that it was a disjointed mess, but it enchanted me just the same. Years later, of course, I saw the actual film, because the movie that charmed be was Warriors of the Wind, better known as the savagely re-edited and badly dubbed release of Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind.
Mia DeSanzo (@neschria): I am going to be playing (and writing about) World of Warcraft and Trove. Otherwise, I will be doing homework and housework. This week got away from me entirely, as I spent my evenings teaching my daughter how to parallel park, so this weekend is going to be busy.
MJ Guthrie (@MJ_Guthrie, blog): I will be spending the majority of my gaming time (and then some!) in Mo Mania this weekend! Lots more prizes to give away, and more shenanigans to be had. Hopefully I will see everyone there. As for playing… hmmm, last time we didn’t get much playing done at all! Will it matter which game I am in?
I didn’t really get to watch movies when I was young except for edited for TV ones and our Disney VHS tapes. And I still love Disney movies! I can’t recall any I’d seen that I liked then but don’t like now, but there is one that affects me very differently. I loved Dirty Dancing (I mean, come on – Patrick Swayze!), and I still do like the movie. However, as soon as I had a daughter and watched it again when she was little, the entire feeling changed. Watching it as a mom thinking of her little girl vs watching it as a young teen, it lost a bit of the romance. I think the same thing with Pretty Woman: Funny romance, or telling your daughter it will all work out if she becomes a prostitute? Messages look a bit different once you have those kids and look at it more critically that way. (And yes, I like both certain romcoms and many action flicks where people blow up into a million pieces. And horror! Can’t pigeonhole me!)
Samon Kashani (@thesamkash): Not a lot of gaming this weekend. I’m feeling pretty stalled out in general. Luckily Ashes of Creation: Apocalypse drops Tuesday and ArcheAge on the 30th, so that’s where I’m looking at now.
The Karate Kid. Hear me out though – pitchforks down! It isn’t that I don’t like it, but it’s not the story that I thought it was. I used to think it was such an underdog beating up the bully kind of movie. But if you really watch it again, Daniel is kind of a jerk kid constantly messing with Jonny; almost every encounter with Jonny he kind of provokes. Watch it, you’ll see.
Bonus question: The Phantom Menace. I was a child. I didn’t know any better. Don’t judge me.