WRUP: My best jokes that our editor-in-chief said I was not allowed to make this week

    
21
This might be employed.
  • I was informed that there was no circumstance wherein a joke about the proper care of sufferers of Hansen’s disease was appropriate, much less one that had such an ambiguous stance and tried to tie it into French nobility.
  • Not only was I not allowed to write the game’s title as “Fartnite” but I was also not allowed to devote the paragraph to being entirely about what if we farted in the dressing room but we were both guys. Ha ha, just kidding! Unless…
  • I was not allowed to cut off a paragraph partway through a sentence with absolutely no
  • My three-part “Weasel Escape” scavenger hunt was refused, and when she said that we could use it for April 1st she didn’t understand why the joke wouldn’t work at all then. I mean, how can I work under these conditions? What am I doing here if not trying to advance the field of unexpected Dadaist comedy?
  • When I asked her that she got really quiet and said, “You’re a journalist. This is an MMO journalism job. You do understand what that is, right?” I asked if she meant like World of Snurcrupft.
  • She asked me if I meant World of Warcraft and I said that was what I said. Then she asked me to hold out both of my arms in front of me and got really freaked out when one kept drifting down.
  • I was informed that I could not use my unexpected stroke as a reason to call the president of the Internet and prevent anyone from saying mean things about What Are You Playing.
  • Lastly, the pharmacist joke. Wait, that wasn’t Bree. You don’t deserve the pharmacist joke.
  • Le bup.

Bonus question: What’s the new job that you’ve felt the most nervous before starting?

Andrew Ross (@dengarsw): I’ll be doing a mix of my usual exercise games, but also I’ll be in Pokemon Violet helping people with the Cinderace event and maybe a bit of Splatoon 3 as I did some major spending and need cash/chunks.

Probably my last full-time gig, as it was outside my field and I realized pretty fast that it wasn’t the job it was advertised as.

Brianna Royce (@nbrianna, blog): Lord of the Rings Online is my home right now – I’ve been mucking around with alts, making my way through Gondor, and catching up my crafting.

This job! By a lot!

Chris Neal (@wolfyseyes, blog): My entire existence has been Vampire Survivors, so I think an MMO gaming break is called for; there are raid fights to learn and island levels to earn in Final Fantasy XIV, a Path of Fire to walk in Guild Wars 2, and a fleet carrier to help keep operational in Elite: Dangerous… right after one more Vampire Survivors run. For real this time.

Beginning my writing career was easily the most stressful start, honestly. I still don’t know I deserve this work sometimes, but I will always be grateful for it and to those who read my stuff!

Eliot Lefebvre (@Eliot_Lefebvre, blog): I’ve still got patch stuff to catch up on in Final Fantasy XIV, so that will take up a fair chunk of my time this weekend. Beyond that, I think I’ll mostly be working through some Christmas gift games I haven’t touched yet… and setting up my desk and workspace a bit more.

Honestly, a lot of jobs have made me nervous. I start another new one next week and I’m intensely nervous about living up to the expectations invested in me… even though I maybe shouldn’t be. It’s the sort of job I’m grateful to be doing, though.

Mia DeSanzo (@neschria): This is the weekend between my birthday and my husband’s birthday, so it will probably be taken up with festivities.

I had job straight out of college that I was very nervous about because it was a good civil service job. A bonafide grown-up job! (I was already 45 years old, but I had mostly worked retail and food service up to that point.) After a couple of months I realized the 1.5 hour commute (each way!) and the policies I had to follow/enforce were not for me.

Sam Kash (@thesamkash): I’m taking a crack at HEROish on Steam. It’s a port of a mobile game. It doesn’t seem like it’s blowing me away but it is a pretty fun little game. I’m also running my GW2 festival dailies like usual.

Bonus: My first job out of school definitely had me nervous. Pretending to be a professional after sitting on my butt for a year because I was evidently unhireable was terrifying.

Every Saturday, join the Massively OP community and staff for What Are You Playing, our roundup of what MMORPGs and other games we’re hoping to play this weekend (with a bonus question or two for our amusement). Tell us what you’re up to! Go off-topic! And don’t forget to have fun!
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