Hi, welcome to Horror Burger, home of the skinless monstrosities and bottomless fries! Can I take your order? If you’re unsure of what you want, I recommend the non-Euclidean Fish Sandwich. It’s 100% fresh Atlantic cod pushed through the unknowable surges of unreal space into a twisting horror, served on a fresh brioche roll with unspeakable sauce whose name will cause you to bleed from your eyes! Oh, and tartar sauce, of course.
Oh, that’s not what you want? All right then, that’s… yep, a large Unspeakable Burger meal with onion trapezohedrons and a Coke Zero Ichor, two Unchicken Specials, and an order of Chocolate Reason Bombs? Would you like to get a special edition cup with text that will drive you mad should you attempt to utter the words as well as a reusable straw? No? All right, the total comes out to e̴̝͙̝̜̘̱͛̾̅į̶̙̦̰͉̩̦̪̐̒͑̈́̈́̐͜ͅǵ̴̢̜̞͔͖͎̟͈͗̽̉̾̐̿̚͝ḧ̵̬́͂̏̿̿̕t̷̡̜͔̹͉̰͍̗̿̆̂̔͌̾̄̒̂̿̌̚͘ ̵̨͉͎̳̤̈͛̓̒͌̎̑̈́̍̊̚͝d̵͎̥̮͚̬̆̏̏̂͌̏̋o̷̡̰͚͚̼̰̠̹̪̿͑̈́̿̆͋͌̓̄͐̒̽̃́́l̴͍̙̺̣̅̔l̷̬̹̳͇͚̕ą̶͔̦̫̝͔̹̰̣͓͇̔̐͒̂̇̿̃̅͗̄̚͝ͅr̷̛̯̫͎̰̣͚̰̠̭̺̈́̀̔͊̉s̸̡̜͕͉̣͍͕̻̙̐͋́̐̽̌͊̐́̕͠, and an entry in W̷͇̦̜̻̱̟̼͙̹͎͚̼̤̭̑̃͑̈́̉́͌̃̿̄̈̇̃̓̕ͅh̵̢͎̘̩̠̪͉̹̦̥̪̓̈́͌̽ͅã̵̱͈͍̱̒͐͑͜t̴̲͓͈̘̖̞̆ͅ ̴̧̨͔̥̫͔̝͎̝̥̹̠̩͙̘̋̑̾͆̒̉̇͑̅̈́Ä̴̡͕̯̦̹̇̔̌̍͂̀̅̓͛̈́̕̕͝r̷̦̮̰̙͓̫̮̺̳̠͖̠͐͋́ẹ̴͈̮̱͕̻̼͔̮͉̣̬͍͓̾̽͋͋́̃̌̚ͅ ̴̡̝̚Y̶͙͚͉̭̱̹͖̘̥̑ǒ̸̼̦̤̟̹͎̜̘̟͍̜͈̼̇́̌̾͗̌̌̎͒̚͝u̶̖͖̩͚̙̺̘͒͗́̕̕ ̵̻͚͕̫̗͍̜̤̲̯̙͙̤̄͊̂̽̓̋̃̇͋̂̐̓͜͠ͅP̶̨͂̃͐̀̈́̽̃̚͠l̸̘̗̗̦̯̈̊ä̵̛̮͈͜y̴͕͔̤͖͙̭̣̗̌̇̔̾̎̍̌̇͊̍̅̓̿̈́į̸̧̡̥̳͖̮͙̣̃̊͆̍̒͑́̕͘n̸͍͙̫̘̈́͊̃̈́͗͋̿̓̚͜͜͝ǧ̴̡̢̟̠̻̂̕
Bonus question: What’s your ideal snack for when you’re hungry enough to want food but not enough for a full meal?
Andrew Ross (@dengarsw): Orna may get neglected a bit since I want walking motivation, which means Pokemon Go will get some attention. However, I really want to go hard into Pokemon Legends: Arceus. I’m digging the new Pokemon gameplay, but I really wish it was open world and multiplayer, even if limited to 4 people.
For the bonus question, nuts and/or dried fruit tend to be my go-to snack.
Brianna Royce (@nbrianna, blog): I’m still in Lord of the Rings Online. I technically made it through Moria and took my first breath on the other side, but I went back in to work on the storyline quests, and I have… regrets. But I’ll leave for Lorien this weekend. It wasn’t as bad as I remembered from my old toon’s trip through, but it’s still not good.
I try to drink first instead. I don’t always succeed.
Chris Neal (@wolfyseyes, blog): I’m thinking this weekend will be about less aggressive games. Probably doing some space trucking in Elite Dangerous or terrestrial trucking in Euro Truck Simulator 2 or maybe even some kind of VR fishing game. Basically, I’m just looking to be very slow paced and easygoing on myself.
Cheese! We have a local cheese shop that has some amazing cheeses of all kinds, and having a few squares of tasty cheese and some crackers is a great snack that curbs a larger sized hunger.
Eliot Lefebvre (@Eliot_Lefebvre, blog): I think I might just dive into the Steam sale and pick up a thing or two. Then again, I also have my existing backlog and Final Fantasy XIV. So who knows, really?
My favorite snacks tend to be crackers with a bit of cheese, but half the time I start making a snack I wind up going too elaborate and then the next thing I know it’s become a whole act of crafting. It’s a bad habit.
Sam Kash (@thesamkash): Guild Wars 2 has another festival ready to go so I’m all in there being a festive boy. I’m also rolling out in Crossout most evenings. I just haven’t had my fill of car versus car mayhem yet. In the non-MMO corner I’ve recently begun playing Unsighted. It’s a pretty cool game. I can’t tell if there’s a good story yet, but the main concept is that everyone you know is dying unless you can give them some magic moon dust. There’s a limited amount of dust, so some NPCs are not going to survive. It’s pretty harsh to make that decision but it’s interesting. The combat is good too.
Bonus: I love to snack on almonds, pistachios, or any sort of nut really.
Every Saturday, join the Massively OP community and staff for What Are You Playing, our roundup of what MMORPGs and other games we’re hoping to play this weekend (with a bonus question or two for our amusement). Tell us what you’re up to! Go off-topic! And don’t forget to have fun!
