weekend
WRUP: Why I stole your cell phones and what I did with them on May 14th, 2013 edition
Ryan Neibler (44) of Oceanside, Long Island: It was very important that I text my best friend a list of wombat facts I had...
WRUP: Song listing for Andrew Lloyd Weber’s next musical ‘Horses’ edition
Overture: several actual horse neighing sounds are played while the actors sit and vape on the stage. One of them occasionally says "horse" but...
WRUP: How to change a tire edition
First step, you should find a tire. This part is easy. Cars usually have several of them. Their owners tend to get mad when...
WRUP: Unfairly rejected suggestions from my Pangolin Improvement Seminar edition
Sounds made: Car horn honking. Lightsaber noises. Screeching metal. The entirety of the Barenaked Ladies song "It's All Been Done." Cate Blanchett gravely saying,...
WRUP: Talk to your children about scrod edition
You should talk to your children about scrod. Not because it's a new issue. They're not going to be asking you any questions about...
WRUP: Three directors whom I suspect of filling my personal belongings with mayonnaise edition
Sir Ridley Scott: On five separate occasions I have seen Sir Ridley Scott running away from my mailbox with mayonnaise dripping down his chin...
WRUP: Son edition
Son. Child. Offspring. Descendant. Genetic payload. Youth. Boy. Boyo. Scion. Youngling. Lad. Squire. Successor. Heir. Offshoot. Spawn. Additional family member. Post-pregnancy. Kid. Sport. Slugger....
WRUP: Famous last lines from movies edition
"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." -Rhett Butler, Gone With The Wind
"Hasta la vista, baby." -T-800 ("Uncle Bob"), Terminator 2: Judgement Day
"Frankly,...
WRUP: Restrictions placed on you as the Trash Lord of the Mole People edition
RULE the FIRST: Under no circumstances are you to smear your subjects (moles) in mayonnaise, Thousand Island salad dressing, or olive oil made within...
WRUP: Complete works of Ozymandias to look upon and despair edition
Now That's What I Call Music (Ancient Societies Edition)
Please note that at the time he created it, it was not tagged as "Ancient...
WRUP: Municipal edition
Municipal. La municipale.
Correct: Diagonal. Fish. Metric. Booger. Pants. Nighttime.
Incorrect: Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred. Fred....
WRUP: Mikhail, the first vendor you see in town edition
Hello, friend! Would you like to trade? You'd like to sell? Seventeen ? Very good, here's your money! May you find good fortune in...
WRUP: Advanced street-crossing techniques edition
The Backwards Banana: The... the what? What the heck is this? What do you want me to type here? Are you supposed to backflip...
WRUP: How to use all the social media sites edition
Twitter: You have two options here. The first is that you can go around incessantly correcting people for things you think are errors based...
WRUP: My fantasy football season results edition
Drafts: Was asked multiple times by the lads whether or not I knew anything about football and repeatedly insisted that I did. My first pick...
WRUP: The following contest is scheduled for one fall edition
Now entering the ring, from Toronto, Ontario, weighing in at 235 pounds, it's Bobby Roode! His opponent, from San Jose, California, weighing in at...
WRUP: The incorrect things you have written addressing gifts to DJ Jazzy Jeff this holiday season edition
Donald Joseph "Jazzy" Jeffries
DJ Jazz-liking Geoff
Hambone Lord
DJ Jazzy John Hopkins
I like hamburger
Deejazzy
Will Smith
Mini-Will Smith
Jaden Smith
...
WRUP: Places where the hag’s curse afflicts me not edition
The hag did curse me, o my kinsfolk, but forsooth, I outsmarted her once again! With a wizened finger she did point and proclaim...
WRUP: I like hamburger edition
I like. Hamburger. I. like hamburger? Hambuuuger. Ham. bougar. I liek hamburger with CHEEEEESE i liek hanbarger. Man e placse serve hunborgor four ME...
WRUP: New conspiracy theories for Winter 2019 to Spring 2020 edition
Seltzer is just denatured alcohol that has been yelled at by professional Yell Masters. It's why White Claws taste good. (If you think they...
